Clash of the Titans (2010)

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Action, Alexa Davalos, Clash of the Titans, Drama, Fantasy, Gemma Arterton, Jason Flemyng, Liam Neeson, Mads Mikkelson, Movie, Nicholas Hoult, Pete Postlethwaite, Ralph Fiennes, Sam Worthington

uh, thanks but I don't date fans...sorry...

PG-13

Sam Worthington, Liam Neeson, Ralph Fiennes, Gemma Arterton, Mads Mikkelson, Nicholas Hoult, Alexa Davalos, Jason Flemyng, Pete Postlethwaite

Spyros: The bond between us, it’s much more than just flesh and bone.  The love we have for you…it’s that love that gods and kings fight over.

Mankind has grown tired of the gods ruling their lives, so they rebel.  Zeus (Neeson) is not happy about this, and allows his brother, Hades (Fiennes), to put mankind in its place.  But the gods didn’t count on there being a demigod (half man, half god), Perseus (Worthington), living amongst the humans and willing to fight for them.

I used to watch the 1981 version of this a lot when I was a kid, but I suppose I just let all of the boring talk about mankind rebelling against the gods go right over my head while I waited for the giant scorpions, Medusa, and the Kraken to show up.  While watching this remake, I came to the realization that, despite having seen it numerous times, I had no real concept as to what the Clash of the Titans story was about.  There were just too many silly distractions in the original for me to care about the story.

Well, that’s not as true for the 2010 version.  It’s a little more serious, and a little less fun.  This version only betters the original in a few scenes.  Most notably, the giant scorpion sequence.  That was pretty cool.

It’s not terrible, though.  Sam Worthington is good, there’s some good action, and a few funny moments.  But overall, it often just seems like it’s going through the motions.  There’s no heart to it.  As is often the case nowadays, the characters get lost in a sea of computer generated imagery.  It’s impressive imagery at times, but that’s not enough to elevate it above all the other big budget special effects extravaganzas we keep seeing.

Plus, there were two major disappoints for me.  One, Medusa.  She was much scarier and interesting in the original.  The Harryhausen stop motion effects actually worked better for her than the slick computer generated effects do.  And where was the two-headed dog guarding her lair??  I was pumped to see them fight that thing, but alas, it never showed.

The second big disappointment was the Kraken.  Booooorrrrring.  He’s barely in it, then when we finally see him, he’s just a sort of nondescript tentacle monster.  I prefer the weirder 1981 version with the rock hard abs.

Of course, the Juno version is the cutest of the Krakens…

which is your favorite Kraken?

All in all, while I never felt particularly bored during the movie, I did notice my interest in the characters’ plight waning as the end approached.  Maybe that’s a product of me knowing where the story was going, but if that’s the case, a good movie should be enjoyable even if you know how it’s going to end.  It should be more about the ride and not just the destination.

In this case, the ride was tolerable, but nothing special.  And it was sorely lacking a mechanical owl…

Don’t mess with the gods…unless you yourself are at least part god, in which case, have at ’em.

10 – 2 for the characters getting drowned out by all the effects – 1 for it all seeming like just a series of set pieces – 1 for a lame Kraken and lame Medusa = 6.0

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Avatar (2009)

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Action, Animated, Avatar, Drama, Giovanni Ribisi, Joel Moore, Michell Rodriguez, Movie, Sam Worthington, Science Fiction, Sigourney Weaver, Stephen Lang, Zoe Saldana

and could you not call me Smurfette anymore? thanks...

PG-13

Sam Worthington, Zoe Saldana, Sigourney Weaver, Stephen Lang, Joel Moore, Giovanni Ribisi, Michell Rodriguez

Colonel Quaritch: Shut your pie hole!

Humans have discovered a planet called Pandora, rich with life and resources that they want to use.  Unfortunately for them, the indigenous, humanoid life (aka the Na’vi) on Pandora lives right on top of the biggest deposit of the mineral the humans are looking to mine.  Paraplegic marine, Jake Sully (Worthington), takes his dead twin brother’s place as an avatar that looks just like one of the Na’vi.  He plans to help the military by gathering as much information about the Na’vi from the inside, but soon learns that they might be a people worth saving.

Ah, original thought…as elusive as Robert Denby and as scarce in Hollywood as the Unobtainium (which should have just been called Oilium) that the humans were searching for so desperately in Avatar.  It also seems to be a feared concept, this “originality”.  It’s scary for studios to try something new when they know that the tried and true plot lines will rake in millions.  Though, funnily enough, it wouldn’t have mattered one bit what the plot of this movie was, as the special effects are the only thing attracting crowds.

So why not try something a little different?  Why not take the plot in a totally different direction that would leave the audience baffled and unsure of how to view the humans or the Na’vi.  Why always make humanity both villain and savior?

I guess I probably don’t need to delve too deeply into this movie, as most people have seen it and heard all the complaints.  Paper thin characters, weak acting, and a recycled plot with a message that hits you like a sledgehammer.  Speaking of recycled, has James Horner lost all ability to write new music?  It seems like most of the score of this movie is lifted directly from earlier efforts of his.  I could pick out bits from Aliens, Willow, and Braveheart, but I’m sure there’s more movies from which he’s cannibalized himself.

So anyway, instead of me going on, I thought it might be fun to have people post comments about how they would have changed the story to make it more interesting or original.  Like maybe Jake could have lived with the Na’vi for a while, thinking he’s getting info, but really they’re getting info about humans from him, then they kick him out and use the intelligence they’ve gathered to defeat the humans.  Or maybe Giovanni Ribisi isn’t so miscast…or the Colonel could say a line of dialogue that wasn’t totally cliche.  Ya know, stuff like that.  Because as it is, if you were to take away the special effects, you’re basically looking at a Syfy channel original…

When you have all kinds of airships and bombs and missiles that can do the job, don’t send ground troops into a forest filled with deadly creatures and 10 foot tall beings that want to kill you.

10 – 2 for an unoriginal plot – 1.5 for thin characters – .6 for some weak acting = 5.9

Terminator: Salvation (2009)

Tags

Action, Anton Yelchin, Bryce Dallas Howard, Christian Bale, Drama, Moon Bloodgood, Movie, Sam Worthington, Science Fiction, Terminator: Salvation

listen, mr. backseat driver, if you don't like me driving through explosions, you can get out whenever you want!

PG-13

Christian Bale, Sam Worthington, Anton Yelchin, Moon Bloodgood, Bryce Dallas Howard

Marcus: What is that?
Kyle: Two day old coyote.  …Better than three day old coyote.

Skynet has launched its attack on the humans and only isolated pockets of human resistance remain.  Their leader, John Connor (Bale), knows that he must find Kyle Reese, the man that he apparently will send back in time to help his own mother survive against the Terminator sent to kill her.  But, he’ll need the help of Marcus Wright (Worthington), a murderer who was subjected to bizarre experiments years before and is now as much machine as man.

I had certainly heard a lot of bad buzz about this movie back when it came out in theaters, so I was ready for the worst going in.  As it turns out, I was pleasantly surprised.  Not that it was all that good, but it wasn’t nearly as bad as most reviews would have me believe.  Sure some of the characters, especially John Connor, could have been more interesting, but Marcus’ story was compelling enough to make up for at least some of that.

The movie really does belong to Sam Worthington as Marcus.  His character goes through more of an arc than anybody, and even though I wouldn’t call it a stellar performance, Worthington shows a pretty decent range.  One thing that did bother me, though, was that they have Anton Yelchin, a decidedly annoying actor, playing the young Kyle Reese, a character I loved as a kid.  Yelchin is no Michael Biehn.

My first post in this blog, back before it was just movie reviews, included something about this movie.  I mentioned that the trailer seemed to indicate that it had a more serious tone than some other big action movies, like Transformers.  Now having watched it, I can see that I was right, thankfully.  While it does have some quick references to the earlier movies in the series (e.g. Bale delivering the “I’ll be back” line), it doesn’t stoop to the goofy levels that most big blockbusters do.  Of course, it does have plenty of things exploding, with little rest between action sequences.

I have to wonder if maybe the weak ending is what really left people with a bad taste in their mouth.  The actions by the humans and Skynet both seem a little uninspired and hard to buy.  The whole final 4th of the movie doesn’t feel like it was very well thought out.  I don’t want to say much more about it, but even though it’s executed well, it just doesn’t have much kick to it.  And it’s not particularly believable.

I’d say the movie, for the most part, delivers on what you go in hoping to see.  Robots, big and small, battling it out with humans for control of the world.  It’s just less bloody than you’d expect.  Why the PG-13?  First Die Hard, now Terminator.  What’s happening to all my childhood favorite super-violent movie series!?

Don’t underestimate the machines.

10 – 1.2 for an uninspiring ending – 1.5 for lacking in much character development – .6 for a couple dull, unimaginative action sequences that go on way too long = 6.7