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I think we might be...LOST.

I think we might be...LOST.

R?

Dominic Monaghan, Ron Perlman, Larry Fessenden

Fanny: You’re all cowards.  There’s money to be made in Languls Island, and it’s gonna keep us all happy and lovely…for a really long time.  And you lot are telling me you’re afraid??
Willie: …In a word, yes.
Arthur: Yes.
Ronnie: Yeah, looks like it.

On the eve of his execution, a 19th century grave robber, Arthur (Monaghan), tells the story of how he entered his chosen profession and about some of the adventures he and his partner, Willie (Fessenden), experienced.

This movie was only an hour and 20 minutes long, but it seemed to drag on forever.  I’m not really sure what the point of it was.

Was it supposed to be a dark comedy?  ‘Cause it wasn’t funny.
Was it supposed to be scary?  ‘Cause it wasn’t scary.
Was it supposed to be an adventure?  ‘Cause…well, you get the idea.

It was boring.  Some of the stories Arthur tells involve supernatural occurrences, but most of them are dull and unoriginal.  There’s one reasonably entertaining sequence on a beach near the end, but otherwise, not much works.

Dominic Monaghan is a likable actor, and he’s watchable here, but his character does not seem like it belongs in the 19th century.  It’s not a very serious movie, so maybe his character seeming too modern was an attempt at comedy.  If so, it didn’t work.

Ron Perlman probably gives the most interesting performance as the clergyman who is recording Arthur’s story, but even his story line isn’t very interesting – and is also quite predictable.

It seems like grave robbing is the perfect set up for a good dark comedy, but instead of using that for a lot of humor, they just have the characters standing around talking for most of the movie.  It just dragged on and on until I started rooting for everybody in the movie to just get killed off so the movie would finally be over.  Though, in this movie, being killed doesn’t always stop a person from walking around and talking.

If you’re robbing a grave, and you find a corpse with a stake in its heart…don’t remove the stake.

10 – 3 for being slow and boring – 1 for being predictable – .7 for poor special effects = 5.3